Tyler Perry posted an email asking for advice on what he should do about a married female friend that asked to 'borrow' a large sum of money. Here's the kicker, she asked Tyler not to tell her husband. I'll wait until you process that one. Don't worry, it took me a minute to process that as well.
Needless to say, he gave her to money. Well, this is what he did. He GAVE it to her. Even though she of course 'promised' to pay him back. Haven't we all heard that before? Here's the kicker, her husband has been seen around town driving new cars, just posted up look all fly! Of course Tyler is feeling salty about the money because miss girl still hasn't paid him back. It's been a few years ago. *sigh*
Here's where it gets crazy. The husband sees Tyler in traffic, motions for Tyler to pull over. Tyler keeps it moving. Husband catches up to him at the light and GOES OFF on Tyler. Talking about how Tyler has changed towards them. How he never hangs out with them and he's all funny acting! WOW! Just WOW!
Now, my favorite part--Tyler had to keep the 3rd Ward (Louisiana joke) from showing up and decided to just bid the dude well and kept it moving once the light turned green!
Oh and for the record, the last time I 'loaned' out some money, it was basically my last. And NOPE didn't get my funds back to this day. Like dude said on The Bronx Tale, was this a good friend? Not really, then just look at it like this...It cost you $20 to get rid of that person! --Thanks Susan for reminding me of that great one liner!
He's asking for advice. What should he do? What would you do if you were in that situation? Has anyone ever 'borrowed' a large sum of money from you and still hasn't paid you back?
Let's talk!
12 comments:
Not directly borrowed. I had a roommate who worked past my job, but had no car. So he would drop me off and then drive to his job and then pick me up in the evening. One morning I get an email, not a phone call, an email, talking about he hit the back of this lady on the way to work. Mind you, this is a brand new car, I hadn't even put the metal plates on yet. So she files against my insurance and then I have to pay like $600 to get the car fixed. But did he or has he to this day given me a dime back? Nope. All I got was the "I feel like shit cause I don't have it to give you", Ummm that ain't helping my bank account. But he eventually moved to FL and when he calls and tells me how he give money to homeless shelters or whatever to stay on the Lord's good side, I just wanna reach through the phone and smack the taste out of his mouth.
Oh, I've been burnt before. Never again. These days, if somebody wants to borrow money, I'd try to help them sort the problem out themselves and if I have spare cash, I'd give it to them and consider it gone. However, some ppl wanna take you for a ride and come back for more, that's when you have to be firm. No means No. Just be upfront about it. If they cannot accept it, well then they're not a friend worth having anyway.
Unfortunately, yes. I "Loaned" her the money, with a contract to pay back as well. Her home had just burnt down. I offered a payment plan. So, out of over $1200, she has paid only $50 back. This was over six years ago. She has since had another baby out of wedlock and I don't ever want to speak to her again. I would file small claims against her if I did not live out of state. Rude. Very rude. Recently, a friend asked me to lend her money, and of course, she would pay me back. Um, no. Maybe she should not have bought all brand new furniture, she would have the money to pay her bills. Makes you wonder. Hmmmmmm.......
I don't loan money. If I have it to give, then I'll give it. But if I don't . . . Now that I think about it, I don't loan anything. My mother told me not to loan anything I couldn't stand to lose. Has worked out quite well for me so far.
Ah, I don't and won't lend money because i don't have it to lose. This is what I follow "Only lend if you have it to give" and I don't and never really did so that sums that up.
Okay as far as Tyler, the bitch in me is wondering why he didn't just call all bets off and expose Ms. Crooked when he saw her husband. All bets would have been off once I realized she wasn't paying me back. And you know what, I know it's too late now but he should have been cautious when she said don't tell me husband. Because you know what, when confronted guess what she can say. "What the hell are you talking about? Money, what money, how much and in which dream did this happen" And who you think the husband will believe? Oh it could turn so nasty
But the matured part of me which tends to come out more often :) says, Tyler just move on and stay far from them. Yes it may have been an expensive lesson but not much you can do about it now!
I LOVE me some Tyler Perry! He was certainly acting in his good Christian nature, but he should always remember that when you loan consider it a gift first.
I'm curious as to the amount. Knowing his girl friend wasn't going to tell her husband was a red flag. Secrecy shows deceit!
Advice from Crown Financial Ministries:
Lending One To Another
http://www.crown.org/LIBRARY/ViewArticle.aspx?ArticleId=483
My last experience loaning money (a small sum) left such a bad taste in my mouth, that I've soured on the concept altogether. If you need money, you're going to have to ask someone else. I can't do it. At least not right now.
As for Tyler's money...he's just gon' have to kiss it goodbye, unless he wants to take her to court for the principle of it (cuz he doesn't need it.) Either way, it's better just to be done with her triflin ass. And if the hubby rolls up on him like that again trying to act like it's Tyler whose being shady -- but that whole "LoanGate" shit on BLAST! And let her pay THAT back. LOLOLOL
Did you know that I'm from right near him?
I don't give more than I feel I can do without. Meaning: If I "loan" someone money, I see it as a loss; I'm not getting it back, so if I don't have it, I don't give it. People don't always pay you back, so I take it as I just spent that amount of money, rather than leting someone "borrow" it. If I get it back, great. If I don't, I've already allocated it in my budget as debit purchase, so I'm not missing it.
But I have been burnt on a few occasions in loaning money, so that's why I have the method I do now.
uhhh no, why? Cuz like Tyler did I GIVE money and I surely don't expect to get it back. I don't care what anyone says about how they gonna pay it back.
The part that gets tricky is when folks wanting you to lie on their behalf. Like Ricky Morton say "don't hold me to a higher standard than you holdin yourself" meaning if you can tell the "secret" then I can tell it too. LOL
My friends already know not to be asking me for any large sums of money. I'm a broke, college student...
But when I have loaned money out, I rarely get it back unless I actually ask. Which I have, I hate having to play collector but that's life.
My friends already know not to be asking me for any large sums of money. I'm a broke, college student...
But when I have loaned money out, I rarely get it back unless I actually ask. Which I have, I hate having to play collector but that's life.
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