I'm not the Queen of Wean(if the mention of poop grosses you out, move on)

My son slept with us longer than most "PERFECT MOMS" would approve of.

My son breastfed until he could all but unbutton my shirt for action.

You know to be honest, the only reason why all that went on for so long was because I could NOT figure out how to WEAN him.

I made the mistake of asking for advice and OH MY GOODNESS who knew there were so many EXPERTS on the topics.

My favorite advice received: He'll do it when he's ready. When he's ready? Yeah right, if it were up to my son, he would still be co-sleeping, breastfeeding, and well, you see where I'm going with this.

Needless to say, I re-tracked my solicitation for advice and decided to listen to my heart.

I did what anyone in my (sleep deprived and bitchy mood all the time) shoes would do.

I cut my son off cold turkey. (don't call the LLL on me) I didn't have a game plan. I just woke up one morning and decided NO MORE of the sleeping with us business. NO MORE of the feet hanging way off my lap while nursing action.

Which leads me to the next adventure.

*Potty Training*
I can hear all the mommies groan for me. Thank you. I know you feel my pain.

There are tons and tons of books on the subject. I REFUSE to buy any of them. I can see me now, marking on the calendar day one of the marathon, stay in the house for a week and do nothing but, race a toddler to the potty all day and my favorite: the stickers and rewards stuff. Kudos to those who've done it.

I don't see the purpose of rewarding a kid with lollipops, stickers and stuff just for going to the potty!

I woke up a couple of weekends ago and decided I didn't care to change anymore diapers.

I didn't make a big deal of it. Didn't make a huge announcement about it.

I mean why would I so I can hear of a mom who potty trained her kid at 6 months. Blah!

We went to Target, bought some spider man underwear, I told my son spider man will be very sad if he gets pee or poop on him so we have to make sure we go potty. OK? OK? and we're on our way.

Now don't get me wrong, I am his biggest cheerleader in the bathroom. I am there cheering him on the entire time. Clapping, running water (you know to get the pee to flow) whatever it takes. I'm there! We're all here for him. My husband has a better advantage than I do because he taught him how to STAND, PEE, SHAKE, WIPE, FLUSH,WASH your HANDS with WARM water and soap and well......nevermind.

I just decided NOT to do the stickers and lollipops. I mean really, how many stickers and lollipops will I be giving out in one day! So what he doesn't know, won't hurt him. I'm just waiting for a kid at the park to brag about the lollipops and stickers they get and it's all downhill after that! Hah~!

Great news.

NO accidents to date. Even nap times are a breeze. I will continue to use pull ups for bedtime only because I know that my son will want to get in the bed with us in the middle of the night and sorry, I love him but, puddles in my bed just ain't gonna cut it.

Until I can figure out the NO diapers for bedtime, we're hanging out with Bob the Builder for bedtime. I am NOT a fan of any of these characters but, when you're trying to get a kid to potty it helps if he recognizes who's printed on his undy!

I'm thinking of cutting off liquids an hour before bedtime. That should do the trick. We'll see.

So there you have it. My son will be 3 in October and he pees and poops in the toilet. Instead of changing diapers, I have to wipe butts. Do you know how hard it is to EXPLAIN to a toddler that he has to wipe from the front to the back! Geez. Just when I thought my life was going to get easier! Hah!

The worst part about it all... Never realizing how gross public bathrooms are until you're in potty training mode with a Toddler who hasn't a care in the world for germs!

Instead of stickers for the kiddos, what about stickers for the mommas that have to wipe butts! Now that's a thought!